Chris and long-time friend Janie returned from their scuba diving adventure in Ambergris Caye, Belize a few days ago, and by all accounts a very Zen time was had. A bit of scuba diving, and lots of sun, sand, reading, mosquito netting, and… and… nothing. Zero. Zip. Nada. Zen. Verrrry big on Zen.

We’ve discussed on numerous occasions the “beach vacation,” and my reluctance to go on one. The topic reared its head again only recently, when Janie’s elderly mother fell ill after all their plans had been arranged, and it came into question, however briefly, whether Janie would be able to go at all. Could it be that I would be summoned from the bullpen for a stint as Zenmeister du jour?

My hesitance (is it dread?) stems from the concept of going on vacation for the sole purpose of doing not much of anything. That is, anything except sitting on the beach with a frosty umbrella drink and a book, and thinking Zen thoughts, whatever those might be. Frankly, I admire those who can do that sort of thing: just shut things down and immerse oneself in a good read for days at a time. For me personally, the mere notion strikes a chord of fear: I think I’d be bored to tears.

Chris hides from the camera at the Victoria House in Ambergris Caye.Chris hides from the camera at the Victoria House in Ambergris Caye. (Photo by Janie)

Now, I shouldn’t come down too harshly on those who enjoy the Zen experience. I’ve had few such experiences in my own life to date, although a memorable one did occur as recently as last year. In Scottsdale, Arizona for the Memorial Day weekend, Chris arranged for massages for us at the Arizona Biltmore. It was the first time I’d ever experienced a professional massage, and afterward I admit I was feeling very Zen indeed. As we waited for our appointment, however, I confess to being weirded out by the goings on at the pool, which all too closely resembled the scene at Bushwood in the Caddyshack movie.

It’s my understanding that the ladies so enjoyed their days of Zen in Ambergris Caye that it may become an annual event. For me, should I ever be called in for Zen duty as a last-minute replacement, at least it’s a comfort knowing that the Victoria House has internet access.

Chris knows that if I’m going to travel to a beach destination, it’s pretty much a certainty that there’s going to have to be something there for me to do, for fear I’d jump on the plane and head right back. Could be anything: hiking, volcanoes, Mayan ruins…just something. (Belize, incidentally, does have Mayan ruins, although they are on the mainland and quite a distance from Ambergris Caye.)

Yours truly did receive at least one incidental perk from Beach Vacation ‘08: last Sunday Janie took us out to dinner at Alo, one of our new favorite restaurants, my reward for chauffeuring them to and from the airport. As if some husband out there would refuse that sort of duty. No matter, I’ll take it. Thanks, Janie.

~kp~